New Year, Same Me
At the beginning of December, I attended a conference. One of the days while there I was able to explore the downtown area after the sessions ended. In one of the boutiques, I visited they were selling a shirt that said, “New Year, Same Me”. I chuckled at this new iteration as I thought about all of the “New Year, New Me” items I’ve seen over the years. I’ve even written a blog with that title and gifted “homemade” undies to friends with that motto. A New Year seems like a great time to start fresh, with a clean slate and renewed motivation for self-improvement. It’s a societal expectation. Fitness centers, diet and health organizations capitalize on that expectation.
If you follow my blogs, have heard me present, read my book, or even know me at all, then I think it’s obvious that I’m a proponent of self-evolution. I believe it is important (dare I say essential) for myself (everyone?) to learn and grow into my/our best. And so, I probably wouldn’t have considered a “New Year, Same Me” mantra. However, that new sentiment stuck with me.
While I promote self-improvement, I also tout the idea of self-love. (The “L” in S.L.O.W. represents “Love yourself first then others”). Loving ourselves first is not how many of us are wired. I find this especially true of professionals in caregiving careers. Educators, health care workers, and such are experts at ensuring others’ needs are met first. It’s something we talk about during my workshops. How do we retrain our brain to put our own needs first at times? It feels foreign but is beneficial. On that note, I like the idea of feeling so good about who we are in this moment. Being content and satisfied to just stay the same sort of takes the pressure off, doesn’t it? No need to come up with a list of things to change as you head into a new year. No New Year’s resolutions to write (and then forget about). No personal goals to share with others for accountability. Just be you, the same. Talking about this concept with a trusted advisor brought me (both of us) a sense of peace.
Therefore, maybe for this year we just focus on all the goodness that currently exists within us. Perhaps it’s ok to just simply revel in the wonderful things that make you, you. Let’s celebrate the characteristics that others love about us and learn to love those things about ourselves. I believe that when we truly see our value it motivates us to prioritize our wellness. It becomes easier to set boundaries, say no, advocate for ourselves when we know, feel, believe our worth.
That gives me an idea. What do you think about this? Instead of writing New Year’s resolutions, let’s make a list of all the things we love about ourselves. I just sensed everyone cringe. I get it! I know, it’s not an easy task. It can feel arrogant and self-promoting to shift our focus inward like that. Instead of thinking about all that we want to change in the coming year, consider writing down the things you don’t want to change? What’s going well? Can you come up with a Top 10? If this feels hard, ask your family or close friends. They should have ideas and can probably rattle them off easily. What are the things they love about you? Listen as they share, take it in. Resist your temptation to dismiss or discount what they say. Let their words sink in. Hold them as truth. Embrace them and carry that forward.
This feels experimental to me. I’ll be curious to see how I do with this new idea of “New Year, Same Me”. It may be a hard habit to break; changing my mindset from what needs to change to how I can stay the same. But I anticipate that reframing my perspective may help me to grow in the “same” ways. If I like how organized I am will I become more organized? If I love how I assert myself in certain situations, will I do that more. Even though I’m the “same” I may become a better “same”. Did you follow that? I’ll pay attention and hope you do as well. I welcome feedback from you as we explore this new perspective. (By the way, thank you to those who reach out with their impressions of these blogs and what resonates with them). As we head into a new year with all its unknowns, one thing we can be sure of is that we can be the same wonderful beings we were last year. Happy New Year!